Old Man
Happy birthday, dad. Man, you would have been old!
I have a few things to fill you in on around here. Matthew is playing football again this year. They had him take snaps at QB and WR! He has way more courage than I do. Makes me wish I gave it a try when I was younger, but I was too busy trying to learn how to fish. Speaking of, I haven’t been out fishin’ in quite some time. To be honest, it makes me sad that I’ve let it get away from me. I feel so close to you when I am holding that rod and reel. I still remember that proud look on your face when I’d cast my line. Shit, I’d give a lot to see that look again. Matthew and Connor have been begging to get out on the lake, so I definitely will do that soon.
Other than football, Matthew is playing baseball and likely will join a team to play year round. He really has taken to first base. Trying to get him to focus on other positions like second and outfield, but he can be stubborn. Wonder where that comes from, ha. He is starting the second grade this fall and has been doing very well. I know you two would have been the best of buddies.
Peyton is growing up so fast. I don’t know how you did it with Sara. Being a father of a little girl is so amazing but also so hard because you want only the best for her. But you know how cruel this world is and that you can’t protect her forever. Would love to crack a beer over that conversation. But she is in gymnastics and in her last year of daycare before going to Kindergarten. She has the sweetest personality and some fire, which I hope she never loses. I wish you could see the bedtime chaos with her. I feel psychotic sometimes, but something about how badly she wants to “tell me something” is so damn cute.
Connor is following in Matthew’s footsteps with his love for sports. I could picture you taking him out fishin’ and him sitting on your lap for hours. He is so kind! There is something about his demeanor that is calming. He will look at us and just give us the biggest hugs and then will kiss our hands as if he knows we are dealing with other stressors. I also think he is going to be my biggest Bills fan with me! We are bringing the kids to a Bills game this weekend in Buffalo. I can already see Connor crying when it’s time to leave the stadium!
Sam is doing very well. She misses your jalapeño poppers or whatever concoction you were making in the kitchen. She quit her full-time job and went fully into private practice! I wish you could see her as a mom. She is pretty dang good at it and I know you’d be so proud of her. She talks about the first time you guys met still. Remember how you gave her that big hug like you knew her for years. She felt that connection. You had that gift. I know you didn’t realize how powerful it was, but you really made people feel like family.
We went to Europe this summer! I had a lot of beer in your honor. Mom watched Peyton and Connor and it was awesome to see how close they got! As mom always has, she had the kids do some really creative crafts and decorate the house as a surprise when we got home! They still talk about all the things “nana from Missouri” does and ask me to do it as well. Ha, I never do whatever it is quite right.
Casey got really sick when we were in Europe and we sadly had to put her down. One of the harder days I’ve had in awhile. Made me think of Mugsy.
I have been doing OK. Still working on my anxiety and not being so hard on myself. I know we talked about that in our own ways before. It’s hard though. But Sam and I started our own practice! Can’t believe I am actually doing it! I am not working three jobs anymore and went part-time at the hospital. Trying to be home more and I am finally seeing those results!
Well, that’s about it for now. I hope you can have a beer up there to celebrate your birthday.
